Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
