There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize
