do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
My life is pants optional.
Randomize
