Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
