why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
