barbara walters just said penis...
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
