do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
