just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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