I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Randomize
