I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
I have post one night stand depression
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
