is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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