I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
