Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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