yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Randomize
