Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize
