and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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