its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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