You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
the condom got lost in my hair
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
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