Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Randomize