I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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