Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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