Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
