i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I have feelings that need drinking.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
