You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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