Three words: puerto rican gang bang
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
that may or may not have been my penis.
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