The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
