i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
