matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
My balls are so social today.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Randomize
