umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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