ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
