Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
