1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
