My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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