Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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