so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
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