i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize