when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
