D3 body, D1 cock
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
