listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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