He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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