I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
