I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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