Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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