Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
