and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
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