I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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