i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Randomize
