i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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