im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize
