I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Randomize
